6/19/2011

Times like These

It is at times like these that I am reminded of my own frailities. It is without a doubt that one day my turn will come. It is not without notice that age will fall upon me as well. Will I be ready? Will I fall or will I rise to the occassion?
Today I talked to both my mother and my father. Both of my parents sounded weak and broken by age today, even admitting as much to me. I heard pain and worry. I heard the anquish that aging has brought them. My father is 76 yrs old and has never stopped moving in all his years. He is of sound mind and until today has always shared nothing but hope and uplifting thoughts towards the ills of his surroundings. And if you knew my father you'd know that any normal person would have broke under the scrutiny he has endured along time ago. He is a survivor and will get thru todays issues. But at some point one needs to ask themself if what we surround ourselves with, is as important as who we surround ourselves with. I refuse to allow my world to become gluttered with the trappings of stuff. But thats another story. My poor dad has only one kidney and is in failing health. I wish that he would get his "stuff" in order and rest once in awhile. He takes on too much for his abilities now. I do believe that all of us forget our abilities from time to time. I will say that I know I've taken on too much and burned myself out physically and mentally over the years. But now that I can see it first hand in the eyes and voices of my parents - I'm seeing something I never want to experience and that is - if you don't take care of yourself - yourself won't take care of YOU!
I want to be healthy - in good shape and take care to lower my overall stress as I become older. But I need to start NOW - not tomorrow or next week. Today I start to nurture and care for me!
My mom is going to be OK - as she is recovering from heart valve replacements. But even the strongest of men and women will succumb to age at some point. How do we combat this, how do we slap age in the face and say ha ha not on my watch??? I don't know the answer to this timeless question, but I do know this - its very hard to watch your parents suffer from their ailments and aches. Its so hard to be here and not with them, helping them. I will help them as soon as I can - I feel so badly that my world has gotten so crowded with stuff that the "who" in my life doesn't get enough of me at the moment. I am making my world less each day and soon the who will have all of my attention regularly. I am making plans to make more time for my parents and friends each day. Up until now my work and hobbies have consumed me. I'm hoping that this one BIG change is going to help keep me young. That sharing my time and myself with the ones that love me the most is meaningful to my overall health (in a good way). I pray that my husband and son can understand that they will have to share me a little more. I hope that they will understand that the chapter in my lifes book called AGING PARENTS is upon me. I want to embrace them (my parents) and hold their hand and hopefully instill some of my enthusiasm into them (for starters). I don't want to see them fall - I want to see them find their way to their next chapter in their books of life - retirement once and for all (which neither will accept). Working VS Retirement - mmmmm - some will say that working keeps them youthful, I say that keeping busy is great but! I have not one but two parents who don't know the meaning of slowing down. Taking on far to much for their abilities. So I guess the moral of todays story is KNOW YOUR LIMITS! I'm gonna get a little closer to them and start showing them the meaning of play! Something they both have forgotten how to do along time ago as well. After all isn't that what kids are for???

3 comments:

Charlene said...

So true Lee! Both ,y parents are gone now and miss them horribly...so spend as much time as possible with them! I just found out I have Diabetes type 2 and I did it to myself....not eating right and so much stress over the last year 1/2...so the moral is....take care of you!!!!! Happy 4th!!

Chris Wooten said...

Lee you go spend as much time as you can with your parents. I so agree with everything you said.

My parents are both gone now and and I wish I had spent more time with them. I let my job, kids and husband take too much time away from them. I did visit them but not as much as I should have. I now regret that too.

Hugs and best in everything you do

Chris Wooten ps where are you from I can not remember. Are you still doing Cool 2 Craft live shows too

fuckoff said...

Lee,

One of things that we need to do is seriously lobby our provincial and federal governments to invest in medical research related to aging. Both my and my wife's parents are in their 70's and we're only 20 - 25 years behind them. There is a serious shortage of people going into gerontology as a medical specialty, and that needs to change in a hurry!

Oh, and retirement doesn't mean not working... It means being able to say "No, I don't think so" and doing what you want to do, nothing more or less.

One more... Knowing your limits doesn't mean you can't keep PUSHING your limits.

Dave (the Cigar box guitar guy in the booth next to you at Art in the Park)